I think I've had this before and I think I have it now, but it's different. At least in the past, there was a euphoria of completing the race that counteracted some of the downers. I feel all the blah, laziness, missing endorphins, etc, but without CLOSURE, with the satisfaction that I completed something. Not to mention the disappointment of not finishing.
I feel really lazy. And dumb. I feel like I've become a dumb jock with nothing to show for it. Maybe I'll go to law school. Maybe I should learn another language. I feel lazy at my job. I need to read more books.
This situation is doubly compounded by the fact that I have another Ironman race in about 4 months, so I can't completely rest on my laurels. (What are laurels? Are my laurels getting fatter?) Oh wait - I don't have laurels cuz I didn't finish :( You know that stupid medal is a lot more meaningful than I previously thought.
I'm not heavier, surprisingly, but my body fat is way up! It got down to 15% at my lowest this May, hovered around 18-20%, now I'm at 22%. I'm getting as tubby as Toby! I ate a McDonald's this week!
I'll be fine; just need to get back on my bike in the next week or so.
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